I welcome you, 2K17!

 Current Mood: I feel brand new lol

 Listening to: Lamb - Wise Enough

 Thoughts of the moment: Apparently nothing LOL

oMG Hey dead people!

Haha it's been a long time since the last time I wrote and even in the last entry I also said the same thing LOL. 

I owe you guys a loooooot of stories! I want to tell you everything but I don't even know where to start hahahah

Let me start by telling you, I MADE IT TO UNIVERSITY! CHEERS MOTHAFOKERS!

MWAHAHA ok chill I'm sorry I got too hyped.

I was not only getting in to "university" university.. what makes it kinda dope is that it's a pretty much a popular and prestigious university in my country. GUESS! 

Lol yup I got into University of Indonesia and I am currently majoring in Tourism. It's a vocational program, though, well who cares, I made it y'all.

I ain't no longer an useless bum.
well who am I kidding I'm still a bum.
I'm trying to get back on track and write more often, No one will ever read this, though, I'll still write since I have so much in my mind I need to get it out. So yeah
It will be abstract and makes no sense but ain't that what makes human, human? lol

How's college?
College is cool. I made new friends and lost few friends
but that's life. people come and go, 'aight? it's their choice to comeback or never.
I'm the one who always left, though. HAHA LOL 
why, you asked ? because I don't feel like wasting my time with people who can be fixed. Not that I try to be manipulative or sociopath but there are these people who don't know what they did wrong and when they do, they don't make a move to make it right. I don't have time for those kind of people,  I'd rather read some webtoon lol. Because there's always time for webtoon. 
I'm sorry not sorry.

My love life?
Lol what a question, I think that's enough of question now, my child.
And yes you knew the answer already. yes. yes. now would you kindly let me leave? thank you
/silently goes sobbing and walks away.
Nah man.. I don't have a love life, I don't feel the need too. I don't know? Maybe I'm difficult to love, or loved.
I mean there were these times when I feel like I wanted it but then I thought,

"what will a boyfriend do any good when I'm already happy surrounded by friends that make me laugh when I need to? and buy me food when I'm outta cash ? LOL"

pLease gawd I don't wanna be a cats-dogs lady but I won't force myself to love when I'm not ready though.

Whatever
I'll focus on finishing my study quick and make lots of cha-ching. 
Love will come on its own when it's time.
ew tf I'm saying that is so najong I canNOT.

Music is Heaven of Earth

 Current Mood: a bit sad
 Listening to: Disney Piano Playlist
 Thoughts of the moment: I still want to be a singer.

omg I've always wanted to be a singer. Deep in my heart I'd like to be on stage and singing and perform. I wanted my music to make people happy through me singing. I wanted my music to make them feel they're not alone everytime they were in a difficult situation. I wanna do something big with music. through music. I wanna do magic with it.

Actually, I don't think my voice is that good or something but I guess.. it isn't that bad lha.. listen to me singing on my soundcloud and tell me what do you think. wait no. I don't want to know what you think about my voice so just keep all the likes/dislikes to yourself. You aren't obligated to like me anyway. and what the hell am I saying it's not like there'll be anybody who'd listen to them, pfftahah!

I've been posting two articles in a row this past two days. I'm so bored I'm a pig I don't do anything besides twerking on the internet. Apparently, I only waste my time mostly by sleeping, breathing, eating, drinking, staring at the ceiling, and internet. wait, it's the same thing like what I've always been doing at class lol. I've never said I was a role model student, yes? my grades wasn't a whore tho. I was doing fine at school. I've made lots memories I'd love to repeat it and make more pretty memories.
To all people at my school, I love you by hating you. peace out
Ah, I still feel peculiar every time I remember I don't have to go to school to heat the chair I used to sit with my smexy ass anymore. I find myself very old (when I'm not even twenty yet) at this freakin state my gosh. hahahhaha

Hahahaha wth I was just talking about my dead dream, and then my recent activity, and then school. this post is a complete non-sense. yup. Idc. I'm the goddess here, I'll do whatever my ass want. I'm so awesome urgh can't.

Ah, I forgot this dream I wanted to tell you guys. Here's the story.
I dreamed that I failed my SAT. -kill self- I'm scared that it'll come true.
Please dear Lord, Jesus, Holy Spirit, Father God, and all Holy things I beg you to help me pass the test. Just this one time. Please cooperate with me. Please make things happen the way I need it to happen.
Please make me pass the SAT. I beg Thou my beautiful Lord. -sobs sobs-
I have no freakin idea what the heck should I do if that disaster is seriously happe.... NO. cAN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT. JUST.. LET'S NOT.
Pray for me please I need you to pray for me to pass the SAT.
Come, let us have a moment of silence to pray for my result of SAT. SERIOUSLy guys, this shet is deadly important for my life. no joke.

I wish I'll be doing fine. I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL NEVER WASTE ANY SECOND TO SERIOUSLY STUDY AND REST PROPERLY IF I GET INTO UNIVERSTY THROUGH SBMPTN. I really hope I'll succeed. I know everyone wants that. So no, I don't hope. I have to. I have to succeed in order to give my family a better living than this. I want to travel the world in a fancy way with family and give a helping hand to the needy.
Lol that doesnt sound like me uh, if you know me.. you'd never expect to ever hear such a thing from my mouth.
because MEH I'M CRAZY YAY HAHHAHA

Sausade

 Current Mood: Neutral
 Listening to: Family of the Year - Hero
 Thought of the moment: EFF-ING A LOT.

Hi, I feel like blogging but honestly I have no idea what to write so excuse whatever things I'm gonna say here. Because what I'll say is just gonna be random as eff.

Oh have you guys heard about "sausade"?
It's a word from Portuguese and Galician that has no direct translation in English. But you can say that it is a word to describe a deep emotional state of nostalgic or profound melancholic longing for an absent of something or someone that one loves.  All credits goes to Wikipedia lol.

nope.
I'm not feeling sausade at all.
I was just thinking that it sounds cool so HAHAHA.

see I told you this is gonna be random, don't tell me I didn't warn you earlier.. But since you're here and already read the whole bullseye, shall we just go random together? we shall. no. We must. I demand it. I'm the one who have all power in this little website of billion website on the internet, so because you're already here, you must do what I demand you to do, which is : keep reading, leave a comment and please follow my blog. HAHAHA no, seriously.. My blog is like a cemetery.
 -sudden awkward silence-

Ah, I've written that I used to have another blog, haven't I?
SO, I decided to go back on my previous blog and read the whole thing, that.. I won't tell you guys because eff.
Trust me, this is for your own good sake.
I can't believe I was once an innocent-annoying-too-honest-little-shet. Fyi,I started to blog since 2009, I guess.. I can't actually remember but I think it was around that year. That means, I've been on blogger since I was 12 y.o. kid. Can't you imagine what kind of stupid shet I wrote back then?
My gosh. HAHAHAHA

TOO FUNNY YET DISGUSTING I CAN'T EVEN HAHAHAHAHA
I still can't believe I ever wrote about stuff and stuff like that ew. I was gross.
No I didn't mean porn but my love life which was kinda shitty and so... urgh. I can't.
I don't know whether I was just too naive or too stupid as a kid.
Thank god now I'm growing up a bit. ok.. a lot. um... a bit? IDK HAHA

Life's confusing but there's no other way than living it and have fun even on any shitty condition right. Easier said than be done. but let us do our best since we're only given one chance to live the life we live right now.  so, why don't we make it as best as possible, no?
We never know when the death is coming to get us. It's probably just about five meters behind you right now, who knows lel
Until then, let's living life we received as awesome as eff 

me is back yo

BOY - This is the Beginning
LOOK WHO'S BACK? IIIIIIII~  HAHA
I'm so happy because finally. I am able to live my life in peace.
I've taken the SAT (or in indonesia, we called it: SBMPTN), and along with that, I am no longer need to go to Ganesha Operation to study anymore. which means holiday is actually in front of my door right now.. But, I don't actually feel I'm livin' my holidays to the fullest at all since I'm so nervous about the result of my SAT..
I think I did well, It was hard, tho..
I've done my best and I wish God'll help me with the rest.
I really hope I'll pass the SAT and get into the university of my dream..
Please wish me a real luck.
Ah, I'm about to take the psychology, so I'll be studying about human and their weirdness. HAHA yas human, yall nothing but a weird living creature. oh what now? no. I'm not a human.
I'm better than human. I'm awesome. hell yea, like it or not I'm still awesome and not human.
-wagging hair- lol bear with me.

I've been spending my precious holiday with doing things I love, my god.. this holiday's the best holiday I've ever had.
I started my day around 8 or 9, or even 10 A.M. then I took my late breakfast and lunch (yes people, double portion. nope. no regrets mothaeffka), helping grandma with stuffs and when I'm done with house chores. I'll sit quietly in front of my lovely laptop, open google chrome, and googling about my babies, yes, and by babies, I mean BIGBANG.
Five hottie men of humanity.

After three years, they finally have a comeback. EFF, I'M SO HAPPY I  AM LITERALLY CRYING HEHE.
It has been ten years since the first time YG decided to create an Idol Group, BIGBANG.
And I'm about living my life as V.I.P for four years and forever.
Sweet cupcakes, they've grown so much..
Those sexy retards are gettin' old but at the same time, they're getting hotter and hotter than before. They'll be having a concert in Indonesia,
............................................................................................... -sudden silence-
and I'M ABOUT TO DIE AT THAT DAY BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE MONEY TO ATTEND THE CONCERT HAHA FML. Why money doesn't grow from a tree? -sobs sobs-
That is why, I'm making myself to promise to start saving money so next time, I'll be able to buy all the tickets for only myself HAAAHAAAAAA
please say Amen. please.

oh look, it is time for reading some webtoons
so,
adios amigos.

I'm bored

 now playing: SoKo - We Might Dead Tomorrow

aye people whaddup
so I was just wondering and I've been thinking that, for almost 18 years of my life.. I'm staying single. OK WHATEVER HAHA THAT WASN'T WHAT I WANTED TO TALK ABOUT. Let's just pretend I've never said that. and You've never read that line..

I'm so bored people, I'm so bored I could eat the whole elephant.. ok maybe I'm just hungry..
oh god at this moment I can't even differentiate whether I'm just hungry or totally bored.

I wish I were somebody else,
 no, it isn't like being me sucks. ok maybe it is. but whatever I don't care anyway.
I just wish I can go traveling and meet new people, real new people, not just a new people I met then turns out they're just like the people I already know.
I wanna go to a foreign land, that I've never known exist. um.. ok that is too much but for real, dude I'd like to do that. Someday I'll do it heck yeah,
I want travelling and fall in love and then die happily :) LOL
I just wish my life will be soon colorful since I'm going out of town.
I wish I'll do something great in future,
I wish I'll find that right person and
I wish I can be an awesome mother for my kids.
OK wtf what am I typing how could I even have kids when I am afraid of gettin' married LMAO.
not cool at all ika, not cool.  ah this thing from my past, whatever, I'll get over it by the way.

I wanna do something fun, like doing a charity or something like playing around with the orphans and make them laugh and forget about the sorrow for a moment.
OR MAYBE I COULD JUST FALL IN LOVE AND BE HAPPY HAHA

but no life's cruel, it wont be easy for all of us.

But that's the thing about life I guess..
   It won't get easy, but it is surely worth the prize we'll get when we're not giving up.
There is always a warm sunny day after a cold heavy storm.
all we need to do is  maybe just hang in there and try and failed and try and failed and try and failed and try until life gets bored seeing us failing and rewards us something more than we thought we deserve.
and I know you've been trying so hard and you are now tired but sometimes all you have to do is just get up and stay strong, because duh, we are stronger than we think we are, don't ever let anyone or anything or any situation tell us any different.
Just keep hang in there, life will get you and I to the right place as long as we hold on to Him.

...wtf where da hell did I get this wisdom
I'm so cool omg I can actually say such thing
darn it, I'll definitely marry myself if I could. LOL no, joke, I'm not that self-lover of a person.
Me is just being positive. lmao whatever this nonsense should stop here.

whoop, here we go

I MISS BLOGGING DAMN MUCH,
IT'S BEEN FOREVER SINCE THE LAST TIME I POSTED AN ENTRY AND NOW GUESS WHAT I'LL BE LEAVING  HIGH SCHOOL SOON. QUICKLY, ASAP.

I just can't believe myself that I've grown so much and time flies so fast and how things have changed.. you see, just like C.S Lewis say:

Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back, everything is different..

 I just..
Damn, I'll go to college and that is also mean, I'll be leaving home and living by myself.
I feel quite excited, and scared at the same. but meh, you know me. I don't care if I'm scared because DUDE! I'M SO LEAVING HOME! YAY HAHA ok joke. I'm a bit excited bcause living by my own means responsibility. and by that, I can show my family that I'm MATURE enough to handle my life.
 the only problem I have now is; where dafuq am i going...
I failed at SNMPTN, and now I have to face the SBMPTN in order to get in to University that I'm dying for.
fml, I still don't understand how people can passed the damn SNMPTN, they're not that smart, tough. um, no offense.
Guess I'm not that lucky, guess I'm a fighter.
Idk, I hate the fact that I still have to study for sbmptn because snmptn hates me.

but it's ok. I'm ok.
I miss you guys anyway.
ah and I've been on blogger since like I was an alien till now I'm a full human.
YAY FOR ME YAY!

school? how about no.

...seriously, it is a real crap.

I can not explain to you guys of how big is my desire to get a drop out from high school with a legal certification, called: ijazah.
I just wanna get out of school faster. I'm tired with school. I hate people at school, well ya know, unless they're my pals.
...OKE, ancur bat grammar gue kayanya gagal dah pake english lol orz.

pokoke diriku, for this moment, hating the school very much.
gue bosen dengan suasana kaya gini, bosen dengan situasi kaya gitu.
gue bosen dengan pemikiran sempit anak-anak di sekolah.
gue muak dengan pemikiran stereotip mereka.
gue muak dengan keangkuhan anak-anak eksis yang, dengan jual tampang doang, ngerasa bisa seenaknya dalam fasilitas publik. 

gue mau cepet-cepet ngelalui UN, cepet-cepet masa nungguin klarifikasi SNMPTN, dan cepet-cepet ngelewatin SBMPTN (kalo perlu). hell na,
i'm like.. i'm still 17 y.o.and duh, it's not like i have a clear sight or thought about how I'm gonna live my life for the future. I don't even know what I should eat the next morning.
gue heran kenapa, setiap insan harus melewati fase-fase kaya gini, pantesan jaman dulu banyak bat dah yang suicide menjelang UN, gile aje..
lo bangun pagi-pagi, dan manasin kursi disekolah dengan pantat lo dan dengan terpaksa, lalu berusaha memproses ke otak segala apa yang diomongin guru, walaupun sumpah.. guru itu gabut dan gajelas, selama 12 TAHUN.
dan kemudian, segalanya itu cuma ditentukan oleh 3 hari dengan 6 mapel pelajaran yang diujiankan.

bunuh aja gue sekarang.

sistem indonesia gabisa lebih buruk lagi ya?
coba deh, kenapa kita para siswa ga disuruh bikin jurnal penelitian yang harus dibuktikan secara fakta yang kalo di kuliah dibilangnya skripsi? tapi dengan kadar yang jelas bisa dipenuhi anak SMA lah.,.

ah gatau lah hahahaha--ha.. -tibatiba nangis-
intinya gue udah sampai ke titik dimana gue muak banget jadi anak sekolahan.
oke fix, kawin ajalah -larilari ke apekapek singapur- /salah lol

ps: harusnya besok gue UH Sejarah, tapi gue stalling time. like um, how about no.

abis ini tidur sajalah HAHAHAHA screw the test I choose to sleep.